Hit Me, Baby, One More Time

“Give me a sign.  Hit me, baby, one more time.” -“…Baby, One More Time” by Britney Spears

Those of you who have been following EurOK have been following the most recent source of drama in my life, that which I somewhat fondly refer to as “the Ross and Rachel saga.”  This journey I’ve been on over these past couple weeks has been a rather painful one; the ghost of my last relationship haunted me mercilessly.

In the midst of all of this my best friends tried to comfort me with words of wisdom about what to do, how to “fix” it, how to make it all better, but they admittedly don’t know how to comfort me.  Rarely has anyone gone through the set of experiences that I have (massive boyfriend-best friend and best friends betrayals all at the same time while dealing with mental illness); it makes it quite difficult to relate to.

It all hit me, baby, one more time.  All the pain came flooding back so strong it was as if I was back at the base of the toilet crying more tears than the rain that came down when God flooded the world in Genesis 6-9.  Perhaps the worst part of the pain was simply that it was back.  I thought it was over; it was supposed to be over.  I’d moved away; I’d moved on.  But it wasn’t over.  Why wasn’t it over???

Sometimes the words you need to hear aren’t the ones that your loved ones are trying, and sometimes struggling, to say to you.  More often, you stumble upon them and hearing them, you internalize them, taking them to heart, and realize that they are, in fact, just what you needed to hear.  I was given a sign.

I’m sure you don’t need me to tell you all of this.  In my experience, this is a fairly common occurrence.  What I’m not sure about is how often we appreciate the little nuggets of wisdom that just happen to come at the right time to speak to our souls and miraculously tell us exactly what we need to hear.  Unfortunately, many times these words fade away, barely leaving a whisper in our hearts, but we’ll always remember that glowing feeling of hearing the right words at the right time and knowing that everything is going to be okay.

Never take those moments for granted.  Something is speaking to you.

Listen.  Something magical is happening.



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