Who Am I?

One of the reasons that I love blogging is because I can put my thoughts and feelings out there uncensored, without having to worry about any sort of judgment.  And all because I write under a pseudonym.

You know, it’s amazing how much we really are ourselves when we’re not ourselves.  When we do everything that we would do if we weren’t afraid that someone might judge us.

People have always been baffled when I tell them that I’m afraid of public speaking.  Not only am I extremely outgoing, but I’m constantly performing in some show or another.  In their minds, I couldn’t possibly fear public speaking- it just doesn’t make sense.  But the difference is, with public speaking, it’s all you- you are the one that gets judged outwardly.  But when you act, judgment of the character diffuses judgment of the performer.

And so, I got to thinking just how ironic it is that when given the chance to not be ourselves- to wear a mask or respond to a different name- that we become the most vibrant and stripped-down versions of ourselves.

In theory, that would mean that if we all came up with the clear conception of who we wanted to be and projected that out in front of us as a completely new person and then strove to be that person, then in reality, we’d actually just be the best version of ourselves.  The only thing that I don’t like about his so-called “theory” is that it gives off a bit of the idea that you should be someone else.  Yes, in this case that someone is you, but phrased in this way it disconnects the growing.  And we don’t just wake up one morning a completely different person or our “ideal self.”  No, we grow into ourselves.  The best versions of ourselves.

Teenage life is a struggle.  High school is no piece of cake, and then you’re thrown out there in the adult world and expected to fend for yourself- the self that is still growing and still needs to be nurtured and taken care of.  By you.

“Who am I?” is a question that will confront you every day of your living, breathing life.  “What do I stand for?”  “What am I about?”

I challenge you all to spend some time with yourselves.  I know that life is busy, but you need time for you.  You need yourself.  A healthy relationship with yourself leads to healthy relationships with others.  Get to know who you are.  What you stand for.  What you’re about.  Just knowing that will help you tackle plenty of young-adult obstacles that are bound to be flung in your way.

And for the adventurous.  Or rather, for those who have the courage to put aside any qualms, I challenge you to start your own blog.  Writing for this blog has opened my mind to so many new concepts that I previously waltzed clean by in my ignorance.  It cultivates my mind, reaping and sowing nuggets of wisdom and questions about life and why we live it and how I want to live it.  It’s helped me to discover who I am.  It’s helped me to get rid of the mask and to grow into the best version of myself.

Don’t forget the sunshine!  Happy growing,

-Enjouée

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